Posted in ASHLEY IN WONDERLAND, MENTAL HEALTH, relationships, writing

09/26/19, 2:05 AM

I wish I had your number cause I could use your particular brand of hurting right now.

See I’ve been doing so much searching and I need your down to earthing real bad.

I could tell you bout my problems and you’d tell me how to solve them and make me feel sorry for being sad.

Because no one ever had it worse than you and you make all my sad stuff just turn rose colored and rad.

Only I get so fucking mad at you, it’s like I didn’t earn my blue, and I have every right to suffer like I have.

But by the time I get mixed up with you I realize that you were the cue, the trigger, and the symptom I already had.

Author:

I'm a 33 year old mortician and cosmetologist who is currently battling lymphedema after a gnarly spider bite. I am fat, wear a lot of makeup, live with my mother, brother, and three cats, go to Disney World a lot, and am undergoing treatment for bipolar disorder, depression, OCD, anxiety, and pre menstrual dysphoric disorder. My head may be a mess some days, but my heart (typically) means pretty well.

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